Became Willing and Came to Believe
The last two meetings I've attended have been on Step 2. (And it's not even February!) "Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity."
I find that Step 2 was actually a little different for me when I first worked the Steps. More like: "Became willing to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity."
I never knew/felt/experienced God (Higher Power, Universe, Great Spirit, The Force) until I worked this program and lived as I have over the past few years. Sure, I went to church growing up (Baptist and Presbyterian), said the blessing before meals, said prayers, sang in child and adult choirs, went to Sunday school, etc. BUT, I never got "conscious contact" or even really believed in this higher power. I believed that some of those people around me believed, but I thought they were a bit off and the others around me that said they believed were really just like me - they were going through the motions because that's what you're supposed to do. Later, my rebellious streak was allowed to flourish and the churches of my family were left behind. I did go to a Metropolitan Community Church in my late teens and (I think) early twenties. That was more a social thing for me. I felt there was much the same mix of oddballs and fakers in there, too.
Now, having worked the Steps and tried to live more and more by these principles, I find I not only have come to believe in a Power greater than myself, but I know this Power is real. I am plugged in and awake. I do not want to lose this connection, for the peace that's available to me is simply amazing.
I have objectively noted that I may be presenting my thoughts and experience in a somewhat overzealous manner. I am sure that were I to hear someone talking like this a few years ago, they would have instantly been branded "religious nut." The thing is though, I don't care if that's what's thought. I know I am not a religious nut, far from it. I am certainly spiritual and I very well may be a nut. The difference is, I'll not try to convert anyone. I'll not force my views upon you. If you want what I have, ask me and I'll talk about it and how I got it. I wish that my communication skills were good enough to actually convey that information, but they're not. I don't think anyone's are. I kinda wish we could do the Vulcan mind-meld so you could know what I know.
The blessing and the curse of this program: I have this wonderful thing that I have to give away to keep, but I'm not really capable of giving it away - only of trying to. If you want it, you have to get it for yourself. But, you're not alone. There are people all around trying to give it to you. We'll try our best to share with you what works for us.
On a sad note:
I now see that what I've gotten through this program is what some people (previously known as oddballs) get through religion. The sad bit is I think there are many more in and out of churches that don't get it and may not ever find a way to get it. A religion underserves the masses by saying it is the only way to find God. May more and more of the masses learn there are many paths, for no one path is right for everyone. I'm grateful to be on mine.
I find that Step 2 was actually a little different for me when I first worked the Steps. More like: "Became willing to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity."
I never knew/felt/experienced God (Higher Power, Universe, Great Spirit, The Force) until I worked this program and lived as I have over the past few years. Sure, I went to church growing up (Baptist and Presbyterian), said the blessing before meals, said prayers, sang in child and adult choirs, went to Sunday school, etc. BUT, I never got "conscious contact" or even really believed in this higher power. I believed that some of those people around me believed, but I thought they were a bit off and the others around me that said they believed were really just like me - they were going through the motions because that's what you're supposed to do. Later, my rebellious streak was allowed to flourish and the churches of my family were left behind. I did go to a Metropolitan Community Church in my late teens and (I think) early twenties. That was more a social thing for me. I felt there was much the same mix of oddballs and fakers in there, too.
Now, having worked the Steps and tried to live more and more by these principles, I find I not only have come to believe in a Power greater than myself, but I know this Power is real. I am plugged in and awake. I do not want to lose this connection, for the peace that's available to me is simply amazing.
I have objectively noted that I may be presenting my thoughts and experience in a somewhat overzealous manner. I am sure that were I to hear someone talking like this a few years ago, they would have instantly been branded "religious nut." The thing is though, I don't care if that's what's thought. I know I am not a religious nut, far from it. I am certainly spiritual and I very well may be a nut. The difference is, I'll not try to convert anyone. I'll not force my views upon you. If you want what I have, ask me and I'll talk about it and how I got it. I wish that my communication skills were good enough to actually convey that information, but they're not. I don't think anyone's are. I kinda wish we could do the Vulcan mind-meld so you could know what I know.
The blessing and the curse of this program: I have this wonderful thing that I have to give away to keep, but I'm not really capable of giving it away - only of trying to. If you want it, you have to get it for yourself. But, you're not alone. There are people all around trying to give it to you. We'll try our best to share with you what works for us.
On a sad note:
I now see that what I've gotten through this program is what some people (previously known as oddballs) get through religion. The sad bit is I think there are many more in and out of churches that don't get it and may not ever find a way to get it. A religion underserves the masses by saying it is the only way to find God. May more and more of the masses learn there are many paths, for no one path is right for everyone. I'm grateful to be on mine.
